Tipping the Scales, Part II

As I typed in yesterday's entry, I've decided to do something positive to remedy my recent weight gain. As I also mentioned, probably the most important step to doing this is planning towards my goal. I've tried to lose weight before and have never had any success- if I had, I would not be in this condition to begin with! So, I started planning today. I gathered up all of my cook books and recipes and marked the healthy meals that looked at least semi-tasty. I've decided that if I do this, I have to make it stick. And in order for it to stick,I have to do more than just diet and exercise, I have to do a complete lifestyle change. That means I have to like what I'm eating- perhaps that is what has gotten in the way before. Next, I flipped through my Self mags and looked for exercises to target the areas that I need the most help on. I already do 3 plus hours of exercise on my quads, hamstrings, and glutes each week with physical therapy (not that it's showing). Basically, what I'm looking for are abdominal toners and bicept & tricept toners. The biggest challenge, though, will be getting sufficient cardio (never my strong suit). I suppose by making my intentions known here, I will be able to hold myself more accountable.

Tipping the Scales

After stepping onto the scale and noticing a much higher number than usual, I've decided that something must be done to remedy the ever climbing number. It is not as if I am sedentary; In fact, with my physical therapy appointments, I am getting more than the required amount of exercise. The problem lies in my immense love of sweets. Today, for instance, I enjoyed 2 peanut butter cups, a pack of gushers, and a piece of raspberry cream pie. Even I realize that this is entirely too much. And there lies the problem.

Some one once told me that the key to success in anything lies in the planning stage. It is easy to recognize the problem and even easier to forsee the desired outcome. The one thing standing between most people and success is a lack of planning. If you are not fully prepared for anything that may come between you and your goal, you will find yourself unable to overcome obstacles. This lies directly in contrast to my favorite quote of the moment, which says, "The most successful people did not know how they would become successful, they only knew that they would," The Secret. It seems I will have to incorporate the advice of my good friend as well as the advice of The Secret. I will envision my success while laying out a plan. Any suggestions are welcomed.

A Streak of Bad Coincidences?

I received some absolutely awful news tonight. My older sister, who lives in Florida with her husband, was in a car accident. I don't believe in luck, but if I did I would think that our family was having a very unlucky year! In August, my fiance and myself were in a car accident and both very badly injured. Six months later, we are still desperately striving towards normalcy in our lives. Our injuries are mostly healed- more so for Travis than myself, but our lives are still in shambles. In January, my younger brother (22 years old) was doing a transport for work in a company vehicle. He was tired from working multiple shifts back to back and mistakingly pulled out into an intersection while the light was red. He totaled the vehicle and hurt his back. On the 14th of February, my younger sister (18 years old) was on her way home with her fiance, when another driver hit a patch of ice and hit their vehicle head-on. All involved escaped with only minor injuries. And now, this news from my eldest sibling, Mary (27 years old). Like I said, I do not believe in luck. What I do believe is meaning behind coincidences. Four totaled cars in 6 months is a huge string of coincidences. I hate to read too much into this, but I notice an indeniable pattern here. It's like A.C. Clarke said, "Twice is a coincidence, thrice is a pattern." So, what is the key to this pattern, then? Add into the mix, my parents' house fire and it seems that we are all being tested. Lets hope that we can pass.

E-commerce

There has been such a rise in e-commerce businesses out there that when I tell someone that my fiance and myself own an e-commerce business, they scoff. Nobody believes that there is such a thing as success in a business if hard labor and long hours are not neccessary. I'll be the first to admit, the number one rule of economics is not suspended for those of us who chose to take control of our own financial futures. We work on our business! We work hard at it- contacting people, setting up appointments, showing others what we have to offer. And more often than not, people say no. Being told no is not a problem. We offer to others what we have seen happen in large scale to those around us and that which is just starting to work for us, if they're UN-interested, that is their prerogative. Some people just aren't very good at working for themselves. If we weren't doing this, though, we would not be making strides toward financial independence. So I'll take the funny looks and the hard work, if it means that I won't spend my old age working at Walmart, just to get by.

Here Comes the Bride

On August 5th, 2007, my then boyfriend asked me to marry him. It was something like his fourth attempt at a proposal and though, it was far from romantic, I said yes. In my car, on the way to my five year high school reunion, Travis and I were chatting about random things and listening to the radio, when he turned to me without warning and held out his hand, in it a ring box. "So," his voice was shaking a little and his grip was tight on the box, "do you think you might want to wear this," he said. I took the box out of his hand and put the ring on my finger. I had tried it on a dozen times and knew even before he gave it to me, that I loved it. Instead of saying yes, or 'OF COURSE' (the thing I wanted to say most), I looked over at him, utter confusion betrayed in my face and asked the question that I just couldn't withhold, "So, does this mean that we're engaged then?"

That was eighteen months ago now and in the time that we've been engaged we've seen our share of ups and downs. Our wedding had been twice postponed, when we finally set our wedding date for July 18, 2009. Once again a major wrench was thrown into our plans, in the shape of a terrible and life threatening car accident. We have done what we can to preserve our plans for a July 18th wedding, but have come to realize that this is an impossibility. So now, we seek an alternative, something to replace our previous wedding plans. After all, as Travis put it after his unconventional proposal, it doesn't matter how we do it, as long as we end up together.

Correspondence

In a final effort to rekindle my friendships, I've re-instituted keeping in touch amongst the ladies who have shaped the last 5 years of my life. We all said that we would stay friends after college; there was even talk of annual vacations, just us girls. After a mere 2 years though, I have noticed that we haven't done a very good at keeping our word to one another. I'm sure it happens all the time- "Keep in touch" seems to have become such a cursory statement. I remember jotting the same 3 words on the back of my senior pictures before handing them out to my high school friends, 6 years ago. I'm only in contact with 2 of the people on whom I bestowed my friendship back then. What has gotten into us as a generation? Why are we so bad at keeping contact with those who are close to us? My grandmother still writes to friends she had in grade school and I can barely keep track of my own sisters! Have we become so dependent on technology that if we aren't emailing, we aren't talking? Perhaps that is it. Only when I appointed monthly email updates did I hear anything from my pals. Even I have avoided making phone calls to these friends that I miss so much, worried that I won't have anything interesting to say. But no longer, I'm committing myself to this.

To Strive or Not to Strive

I went to the doctor today for my six week follow up (I have had orthopaedic appointments every six weeks since August). As usual, I waited an hour in the waiting room. As usual, they took me in for the usual battery of x-rays followed by another 15 minute wait in the examining room. Instead of the usual walk around the room and squats that the doctor normally observes, though, my doctor didn't insist upon a fitness performance today. Today, he asked me something entirely different, am I ready to give up. I have to say, the question took my by surprise. My doctor was inquiring as to whether I wanted to continue trying to improve my physical circumstances! Since the car accident, I have been physically limited, not to mention the pain that persists on at least a semi-weekly basis. He wanted to know if I was willing to settle for less than ideal physical health and truth be told, I was tempted. It's not a picnic going to physical therapy twice a week, just so I can be as good as I was 7 months ago. I left without giving the doctor an answer. I think I need to think a bit more before deciding whether or not to give up on myself.

The Chips have Fallen, Where to Next?

When the chips are down, where do you turn? Recently, I was in a car accident. A careless young man, mere months younger than myself, decided to get behind the wheel of his car after drinking entirely too much. As a result of this person's actions, I have spent months in rehabilitation, just trying to get my life back on track. When faced with the consequences of his actions, though, the other driver (lets call him Mr. X) claimed what I'm sure many others in his situation would have claimed: he was young, he came from a good family, and he had community support to help him overcome this new "obstacle" in his life. The judge responded favorably (at least, favorably for him) and treated him to a slap on the wrist. Mr. X had to complete minimal community service and pay a tiny little fine, the total of which fell short of even my most minimal medical expense. So the question remains, what is the next step? Do you loose faith in God? Do you loose faith in the system? How does one overcome such an enormous set back? The truth is, once you experience something to the capacity of that which I am currently struggling, you are never really the same. I will always grab for my fiance's arm, when there are headlights heading in our direction. I can never watch a movie with a car accident in it, without tearing up. The goal is to live with your new limitations, to function in less than ideal circumstances. So, I might not know where to turn and I may never totally regain faith in the judicial system or society, for that matter. But I will continue in my strive towards normalcy and maybe, in time I will be able to close my eyes without reliving the whole terrible event.